BFF No More

Dear Blogger:

EAR CANDY: No Doubt - "Don't Speak"

It has been nearly a week since the newest turning point in my life. I highly doubt the person would ever see this, but if he does, then I do not really care for things do not really matter anymore.

I lost my best friend. No, I haven't lost Kim or Naomi or Kellie or anyone like that. I'm referring to my best guy friend, Chris. Yeah... Things just blew up between us, and I really do not know why. All I know is that I am lost in what happened.

This is what happened: We have not really spoken in a couple months. I have sent him the occassional text to see how he was doing, what he was up to, how much I miss him. I've never gotten anything in return. After long weeks and weeks of this absurd behavior, I decided to just ask if there was something going on between us, if he was mad at me. What I got back in response shattered me. "Not mad. Resentful." Tell me... How would you feel if your best friend told you that and meant it? I was beyond torn. I tried to figure out what I did wrong to offend him so, but all I got back from his messages were that I was an "asshole," and that he was pissed off and hurt that I "didn't wanna hang out with just [him]" and that I apparently "treat people that [I] supposedly don't like with more kindness than [I] do [him]." He threw in somewhere that when I say "stfu" to him in front of others, it also hurt him and made him feel like a punching bag. I don't understand any of this because we were always joking around. He was always picking on me, saying worse things repeatedly, and we were just fine.

Whatever. I am done. I cried and cried for a long time. I even almost went back to the old habits that suffocated me before. Surprisingly, despite how badly it hurt at the time, I am moving on. I am now done with it all now.

-Kat