Candid Thoughts

Dear Blogger:

I think the thing I like most about you is that you aren't as popular as other blogging sites. At least, on my page, you don't bring in too much traffic--if any at all--and I enjoy that aspect. I can be as candid and raw as I want without having too much criticism or anything.

And I want to just say...

I still love him. There hasn't been a single day that's gone by where I have not thought of him. Every day I see little reminders of him. I still do not know what to do with such sentimental items, but that's okay. I am taking it one day at a time.

Part of me wants to still be with him. Part of me wonders what he's been up to. Part of me still worries about his well-being. Part of me is too deeply hurt to wholeheartedly wish him well. But the silver lining in all this, I still love him. I still care too much, and that's just how it'll be. My feelings have run deep for him since the first day I met him, and that still rings true today.

He'll never know it though. I'm slowly coming to terms with that. He'll never understand my love for him. He'll never know the suffering or the darkness. He'll never feel the agonizing death of his heart being broken.

*sigh* But that's where I'm at now. Still shrouded in suffocating blackness. Still inching my way through muddy waters. Still coping with the process.

-Kat